RMSEOWOFFFXFic In A BoxYuletide (letter link)DNWs

rare male slash exchange 2020

Exiled Warrior King/Man He's Protective of Who Doesn't Know Who He Used to Be
Scriptorium Monk Drawing Dirty Marginalia/Monk in Charge of Illumination Project
Unicorn only visible to virgins/Sexually promiscuous Prince

Possible Prompt Ideas & General Likes

Scriptorium Monk Drawing Dirty Marginalia / Monk in Charge of Illumination Project

  • + Crack played straight. Serious premise played for laughs. What if: a monk is required by his brethren to take a vow of silence for a year? What if drawing the dirty marginalia is the only way he can flirt during these trying times?
  • + Epistolary/Diary-based narrative. 1st, 2nd, 3rd person POVs are all great. What if the Monk in charge of the project keeps a ledger/chronicle of the all of the work that the scriptorium does, as the monk becomes more and more distressed by the dirty marginalia.
  • + THE DICK TREE. If you're not familiar with it, search for "the dick tree marginalia" to behold it.
  • + Snails. Jousting snails. Cat snails. The snails come for us all. Snails on medieval manuscript are thought to be signs of slothfulness, and other sins that might defeat us. Then what, praytell, does a snail blowing a monk mean??
  • + Hate fucking totally cool. Angry fucking: also rad. Accidentally smashing furniture while sex is happening is the best. If one person is incensed beyond reason, I would hope it is the monk in charge of the project, while the dirty marginalia monk is beatific about his shenanigans.
  • + If you're stuck for what the marginalia is being drawn on, please consider: Roman de la Rose.
  • Exiled Warrior King/Man He's Protective of Who Doesn't Know Who He Used to Be

  • + Identity Porn, in either direction.
  • + Wandering/travelogue. Perhaps the two are travel companions, and they're heading to a new city/duchy/kingdom/holy site to regain favor that had been lost.
  • + Tournaments! If you're a fan of a Knight's Tale, using the tournament setting / jousting / sword fighting events as a frame for this fic would be exciting. The warrior king perhaps trying to make a romantic match for himself through the games, only to discover he's actually into the man instead. (Be he: a rival knight, a man of the court, a companion-in-arms).
  • + Oh no, that's too much peril. Perhaps the man the king is protective of likes to get up to Shenanigans, and keeps discovering new ways to imperil himself and the Exiled Warrior King.
  • + Heretics and Dissidents, oh my. Or perhaps the man is a political or religious dissent, whose ideas are dangerous/heretical and ...are spreading. The duke/prince/king of the current land has set a price on the man's head, and the exiled warrior king is confounded to discover he's not Public Enemy Number 1.
  • + Age Gaps. Age difference in this ship is a-okay, if you wanted to go in that direction. Maybe the exiled warrior king was exiled long ago? If there is a significant age difference between the two men, I would really appreciate if the aged warrior king is still pretty much a badass.
  • + Cave Sex! Sex in an inadvisable location. (Semi-public sex, sex in a garden, sex in a barn, or in a forest, CAVE SEX)
  • + PWP would be outstanding, but so would plotty unrequited pining.
  • Unicorn only visible to virgins/Sexually promiscuous Prince

  • + Crack? SERIOUS PINING. You decide!
  • + I would be enchanted by the prince deciding that he's totally into the unicorn without ever laying eyes on it, and then pining for it hardcore without any other evidence of its existence.
  • + Or the prince, having seen it by accident? The unicorn mistook the prince for a virgin? Questionable unicorn decisions would be great.
  • + The Prince being that Dude with the Historical Equivalent of a Conspiracy Board re: unicorn sightings.
  • + Obsession, played for jokes, or played (semi) seriously.
  • + Story told from the unicorn's perspective as he complains to other mythical creatures about how hard he has it, with this crazy fan he keeps having to evade.
  • + The sexually promiscuous Prince rescuing the Unicorn from an unscrupulous virgin regent, who's using the unicorn to prop up a corrupt government. The unicorn having to coach the prince into rescuing him even though the Prince can't see him.
  • original works opportunity 2020

    A Sad Potato
    Garbage-Tier Magical Item
    An Octopus Pleased By Its Own Shenanigans & Diver Who Regularly Visits Its Reef
    Male Angel Stationed on Earth/Male Alien From a Planet He Didn't Even Know Existed

    A Sad Potato

    The potato is very sad. How did it get that way? Will it ever find happiness? Inspired by an Exchange After Dark emoji, which looks like it's having a Very Bad, No Good Day.

    Settings: Fantasy! (Is the sad potato chilling in a food cellar?) Space! (Is the sad potato the first potato in space? Did it grow only to discover it's the Only Potato In Space?) At sea! (Is the potato being transported on a ship??) the 80s!! Involved in a conspiracy somehow (is the potato sad because it's discovered Something Terrible???)

    Gen Likes: crack treated seriously, serious emotions treated like comedy, epistolary fic, outsider POVs, documentary-style fics, fics styled like newspaper articles, satire

    Art Likes: emojis, comics, lovingly rendered portraits, limited palettes, vaporwave aesthetic, still lifes, conspiracy boards, tapestry/art made to look like fiber-arts

    DNWs: Vore, pandemics or illnesses (including potato diseases), french fries

    Garbage-Tier Magical Item

    Give me your crappiest, most garbage-worthy magical items. Find one that you like at a random item generator? I'd love to hear about how it helped (or failed someone) in a dangerous situation.

    Maybe the garbage tier magical item will eventually be eaten by a mimic, who will be very happy with it.

    Setting: Fantasy, urban fantasy, anything that you think would be spruced up by a little magic!

    Likes: books, orbs, knives, spears, cloaks, journal entries, epistolary fic, unusual POVs, stories told with documents. Stories told with fic & art, fics with an upbeat/humorous take on heavy topics

    Art Likes: Very Serious Portraits, fun jotted down sketches, design drawings, fake scrapbooking pages, planning sketches (perhaps an artificer is designing a garbage-tier magical item in their notes?), comics, still lifes, adventurer holding garbage tier magical item in better days (perhaps before it was know how horrible the item is)


  • + heavy angst, defined here as that nexus between anxiety and self-esteem, where someone questions their self-worth or why anyone else could ever like/love/want them and perseverate over such. (Existential worries on the other hand are fine!)
  • + low self-esteem, garbage-tier magical item has a very good sense of esteem. Or no sense of esteem at all! :D

  • An Octopus Pleased By Its Own Shenanigans & Diver Who Regularly Visits Its Reef

    I would love to see some octopus shenanigans. Possibly stealing the diver's camera, and running away with it? Inspired by a gif of an octopus in a sprite can. Gif

    Gen Likes: crack treated seriously, serious emotions treated like comedy, epistolary fic, outsider POVs, nature documentary-style fics, fics styled like text conversations, inter-species friendship, tiny octopus homes

    Art Likes: Michelangelo's Creation of Adam, seascapes, comics, lovingly rendered portraits, limited palettes, shin hanga/traditional woodblock prints, tarot style designs, explosions of undersea color

    DNWs: maiming or other major injury to characters (does not apply to undersea camera equipment), harm or disrespect to nudibranches

    Male Angel Stationed on Earth/Male Alien From a Planet He Didn't Even Know Existed

    Setting: Modern/contemporary settings, Victorian/Edwardian settings, Ancient Greece/Mediterranean, Desert Settings

    Likes: nonbelievers meeting things that they didn't believe in, incorporeal bodies, forgotten things (religions/deities/relics/worlds/soldiers), Inter-species relationships, communication difficulties and/or rapid language acquisition, accidentally stranded on Earth/in a corporeal body

    Kink Likes: a range of consent types from dubious consent to enthusiastic consent (see DNWs for some caveats), fuck-or-die, finger fucking, handjobs, blowjobs, frottage, identity play/identity reveals/identity porn, erotic fear, eroticized religious terror/ecstasy, Clothed/unclothed, under-negotiated kink/sexual play, ritual sex, honor bondage, voyeurism, outdoor sex, sex in temples/museums/dungeons/other adventuresome places

    DNWs: established relationships, fluid & excretion-based kinks, ageplay, pregnancy, drugged/intoxicated sex, dubious consent where one partner coerces the other (I prefer situations when both sexual partners are being coerced by external events that affect/imperil one or both of them)

    five figure fanwork exchange 2020

    Ezio Auditore da Firenze/Desmond Miles

    Honestly, you could write me almost anything about either Ezio/Desmond; I'm so desperate for more. My one plot DNW are timeline changes/AUs where Ezio or Desmond aren't Assassins.


  • + All of the ways in which Ezio/Desmond can happen. Time Travel. Precursor Tech. Meeting in the Duat. I enjoy fic where Desmond time-travels back to Renaissance Italy, or to Masyaf, but I'm also into the idea of Ezio and Desmond both being pulled through time to another location. (Another AC game setting would be thrilling!). Ezio time-traveling to the future is also amazing. (Also: please don't feel like you have to explain how the time travel happens, if you're not interested in doing so.)
  • + Canon-divergence/fix-it fic. Fic where Desmond was just gravely injured by his attempt to save the world with the Eye would be MUCH appreciated. Does Ezio need to track down Precursor Tech to heal Desmond? I'd love to see some Ezio/Desmond hurt/comfort.
  • + Trapped in a Vault. Getting trapped together in a Vault, and then having to puzzle their way out? Whoops, accidentally having sex in a Vault.
  • + AUs and Fusions, just so long as everyone's still an Assassin, feel free to go wild with your ideas! Reality Cooking Show AU where the Assassins and Templars try to outmaneuver each other in a Hells Kitchen-style showdown? Pride and Prejudice AU where Ezio has to juggle his diffidence towards marriage with his need to fulfill his Assassination contracts? Exchanging letters across time like in the Lake House? I'm here for all of this.
  • + Voyeurism. One half of the ship (Desmond? Yusuf? Ezio??) is watching the other with a third party, or by themselves, and they get off on it. Doesn't have to be a complicated set-up; I'm a gremlin of simple tastes. Feel free to use Original Male Characters, or if you want to go nuts, maybe a taste of Ezio/Desmond/Yusuf.
  • General Likes

    Smut Likes

    Kinks that emphasize trust & control, kinks that play with the border between fear & desire

    *Note about Dubious Consent: I enjoy dubcon where both requested characters are coerced by external events/people/situations, like fuck-or-die, or precursors-made-them-do-it, etc. I also enjoy sex where characters aren't into it at first, but are fully onboard by the end.

    Assassin's Creed Likes

  • Adventure fic. Thievery. Heists. Parkour, where parkour isn't strictly needed.
  • Identity Play. Esp. Desmond withholding his identity, origin, time-travel, or what the Isu had planned for Desmond from Ezio.
  • Historical Setting from the Ezio trilogy. Any settings from the Ezio trilogy. Also settings from AC: Origins, AC: Unity and AC: Syndicate are also wonderful. If you're interested in doing historical research, I would be thrilled! But I'm really just here for you to have fun with my prompts. :D
  • First times/get together fic.
  • Ezio being a creaky old man who complains when he lands badly.
  • Ezio coming to grips with his role as "Prophet."
  • Time Travel, or Ezio *not* coming to grips with his role as Prophet, and needing to see something a little more definite about the future.
  • Desmond escaping from the Eye after saving the world.
  • Any of your headcanons about WHO PAINTS THOSE ASSASSINATION PORTRAITS that Ezio hung in his villa and hideout
  • Body horror/Wingfic for Desmond. Desmond being mistaken for an angel is fantastic.
  • Precursor Tech. Apples of Eden. Altair's memory discs. Ezio showily defeating enemies using Precursor Tech, and then in the next breath, being able to give up the tech/not let it overwhelm his entire life is pretty fantastic.
  • Mythology versus Precursor Tech. What if Gods exist as a separate/powerful phenomena?
  • Precursors to the Precursors. "There's always a bigger fish" but with ancient civilizations!
  • fic in a box 2020

    Bayek/Desmond Miles   •   Bayek/Solar Deity   •   Bayek/Set   •   Bayek

    Meeting people! Making friends! Murdering them! Or, Get Bayek A Boyfriend 2k20


  • + How come Bayek doesn’t react to any of the first civilization stuff Whenever Bayek encounters a message from the Precursors at the Siwa Temple, he acts pretty dang chill for someone watching old technology doing its thing. I’d be interested in a fic that delves into why does Bayek finds it completely normal (he’s desensitized to its wonders due to his grief over his son; or he thinks the gods are communicating something to someone else) or why he doesn’t find it normal, but still remains low-key about it (he thinks the gods are trying to communicate to him and doesn’t care about it while he’s still clouded with vengeance?). I’d love to delve into his relationship with the Precursors. Maybe he does think of them, but only after he finds peace for his son?
  • + Trapped in a Precursor Vault. As you might have gathered, I love Precursor stuff. The precursor vaults in AC: Ezio trilogy were fantastic, and would love to see more precursor vaults in Ancient Egypt. The ones that Bayek encountered didn’t seem to want anything from him, but what if he later found one of Juno or Minerva’s science experiments? Give me jumping puzzles! Give me all of the parkour in historical spaces!
  • + Bayek is traveling across the Mediterraean. I would love post-canon fic where Bayek shows up in Rome and gets caught up in further developments in Roman history.
  • + The Solar Barque. Bayek dreams of fighting Apep the soul eater on an empty solar barque, that should have seated Ra and his defenders. Where were the gods? Have they abandoned their duties? Been killed? Been defeated by Apep? I would love to read a fic about this for just Bayek like it is in the game, or any of his nominated pairings. Does Bayek have to take up the fight against Apep again? Who might he meet while he’s in the Duat?
  • + Time Travel. Desmond Miles, my perennial fave. I am constantly delighted by the prospect of him traveling through time while he’s trying to (or already has) saved the world. What if he ended up back in Siwa? He has, to my knowledge, no recollection of Ptolemaic Egypt. How well would he do if he was thrown into the past with no Animus knowledge to help him out? What would Bayek make of this stranger blundering into his home town? Would he think that he’s a Roman? Something else?
  • + In-Universe Personal Documents. Papyri, pottery shards, wax tablets. Give me anything that you think these characters would write, record, steal from enemies (or tombs), keep (or discard). Coptic, Demotic, Hieratic, and Ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics are all wonderful and welcome, if you want to use other languages/writing systems.
  • Ship-Specific Prompts

  • + Bayek/Desmond Miles. Something really funky has to go down to make this ship happen; thankfully, there’s ancient Precursor tech, gods of ancient egypt, the Apple of Eden, and the Eye all ready to make that happen. I’m so curious about how Bayek would take Desmond, who’s SO OBVIOUSLY out of time, and likely not even speaking any of the local languages.
    • I’m really excited to learn more about time travel and to see characters struggling with communication barriers, but if that isn’t your jam, feel free to completely handwave the time travel and/or communication issues as stuff that Precursor tech allowed to happen, and get on with the Feels.
    • Here are two men who’ve spent a great deal of their lives (or in Desmond’s case, borrowed life), exploring the consequences of vengeance. Neither of them thought their lifepath was going to be one in the shadows. I’d be really excited to read about these two characters connecting.
    • I would also COMPLETELY love tropey romance. That stuff is my lifeblood. Fake/pretend relationships, accidental soulbonding, AUs that make Bayek and Desmond a little more proximate to each other (but they’re still assassins), Pride and Prejudice (+Assassins) AUs...all of that would be amazing. Not to mention stuff like mistaken-for-a-god fic. Accidentally-became-a-god fic. Wingfic.
  • + Bayek/Solar Deity. In AC:Origins, Bayek tracks a story of Apollo in the Halo of the Huntress, and an oracle gave a prophecy to Bayek… and this got me thinking. Who else was hot enough to be beloved of the Sun? The Eagle and the Sun are an iconic duo. Please go with the Solar deity of your choosing for this one! I am a fan of warriors falling for gods who aren’t from their pantheon, but I’m open to whatever ideas move you. Slow burn romances are good, but I’m also just into characters that set their sights on fucking the sun.
  • + Bayek/Set. You know Set would hit that.
    • Although Set and Bayek never meet in the game, I've had a hankering to ship the god of disorder and storms with the force of chaos that Bayek becomes. Game lore claims that Set is an Isu revered as a god. You could keep that background if you wish, or you can go another direction. If you're receptive to the idea, I'm into the idea that the gods and the Isu are not one and the same. Gods that pre-date or post-date the Precursors adds a layer of complexity to the Assassin's Creed worldbuilding that would be amazing to explore. If worldbuilding isn't appealing to you, I'm also cool with handwaving this whole issue!
    • How would they meet? Bayek and Set have both ridden the Solar barque and fought Apep, the serpent that devours the sun. Does Bayek have to find Set to take up his old position on the barque? Does Bayek seek him out after his experience in the Duat? Or perhaps vice versa?
    • The Egyptian gods seem to be mostly absent from AC:O, when Bayek isn't having to fight them in the DLC. Has Set retired to the desert, faded in importance, by the time Bayek goes on his quest for revenge? I dig the idea of Set being a Weird Hermit in the desert, but I'm up for anything, here.
  • + Bayek. Give me all of those canon feels. Character studies. Action-adventure fic. The Cat Petting Simulator aspect of AC:Origins. (Seriously, when you get into scritching position, you can attract SO MANY CATS.) I’m here for all of it! And if you want to serve me up Bayek masturbating sadly in the desert. I will never say no to that. ♥
  • General Likes

    Art Likes

  • + Bayek smooching a grumpy cat. :D
  • + Ancient Egyptian Art & Motifs. Ptolemaic Egyptian Art & Motifs.
  • + Bayek in the Assassin’s hood.
  • + Isu Armor! I love the facemask, the glowing bits, the everything about it.
  • + Artwork that uses surreal imagery to depict emotional states.
  • + If you’re into it, PLEASE GIVE BAYEK A CHOCOBO THAT LOOKS RIGHT. The chocobo from AC:Origins gives me nightmares. D:
  • + Shin Hanga-inspired scenes of domestic quietude.
  • + Art Nouveau & Art Deco & Symbolist Styles and Paintings.
  • + Gold and black artworks. Gold foil. Gold leaf. Interference gold. Gold of all types. Yellows, oranges, golds, are a favorite, especially when combined with black and sometimes some accenting white or violets.
  • + Right in Front of My Salad memes for Set. It’s What He DeservesTM.
  • + Tarot card versions of requested characters, especially using imagery from the solar barque dream. Bayek holding his gold shining heart outside of his bloody body. I’M INTO IT.
  • + One of my fic prompts, but art.
  • + The Bookshelf Limbo style book previews are an especial treat for this fandom, since bound codices may or may not have been invented yet (and I'm not fussed by historical accuracy in the least)! I love the idea of finding Bayek books to help Deal With His Current Issues. I’d also be pleased to see Bayek browsing some really boss-looking scrolls. Something that would help him quiet his rage about his son? Something about grieving, loss, and recovery? Maybe some dating advice??? “The Murderer’s Guide To Getting Away With It” or “Tracking a Conspiracy: How To Find The People Who Screwed You Over.” Serious or cracky--whatever inspires you.

  • Poetry Likes

  • + Alliteration. I love alliterative long line poetry from middle English.
  • + Homeric similes.
  • + If you enjoy the challenge of writing in meter, I enjoy epic meter (dactylic hexameter).
  • + However, neither alliterative, nor epic meter is strictly required if you want to tackle poetry for me. I'm open to a range of poetic forms, as long as they capture narrative movement of some sort!
  • + If you'd like to get a sense of what kind of poetry I like, The Shield of Achilles by W.H. Auden is one of my favorite poems.
  • do not wants

    My Do Not Wants change over time for this fandom. If a DNW does not appear on my exchange signup, I've waived it or don't consider it relevant to my current request.

  • + Mpreg and A/B/O.This includes things like oviposition or on-screen pregnancy for requested characters. Mentions of canonical children are fine.
  • + AUs where Assassins/Hidden Ones aren't Assassins. Other than that one caveat, I'm pretty open about all kinds of AUs, including trope AUs.
  • + Snuff. These characters murder a whole lot of people. My preference is that they a) don't murder each other during sex, and b) don't get off on killing people.
  • + Kinks involving bodily fluids/discharge, (e.g. please feel free to mention sweat, tears, blood, semen, within reason. Please no scat, vomit, snot, blood-in-great-quantities kinks).
  • + Gore. I love me some violence, but I am a little squeamish. Please no viscera!
  • + Sexual or romantic situations involving anyone younger than 16. My favorite pairings involve characters that are 35+, and I generally prefer much older characters (50, or 60+) to younger ones.

  • Updated 4 May 2021 for Unconventional Fanworks Exchange.